How to Create a Happy Retirement by
Tuning Out Well-Meaning Advice
Up to this point in our lives,
we've lived pretty externally. We've gone for some or all of the
following:
 education,
career, money, marriage, kids, house, new careers, bigger houses,
etc. And, that's okay. But, if you've been making transition
decisions all along based on externals (should's, have-to's, taking
the path of least resistance, and living up to other's
expectations), then you're headed in the wrong direction for this
next transition.
As you move forward this time, you have a choice: business as usual
(with the same less than thrilling result), or do it differently and
end up with what you really want in your life. To do it differently
you’ll want to take an internal journey. You'll tune in and discover
who you are and what would bring the most meaning to your life. And
ask yourself, what if this time:
- You went for what YOU want,
desire, yearn for, and what would fulfill you and bring you the
most joy?
- You got to bring all of you –
not just the most "appropriate" parts -- to what’s next?
- You stopped waiting to weigh
less or know more or ________ (you fill in the blank) to start
living your life?
To truly revolutionize retirement,
you'll have to tune out the advice that's screaming at you from
these five sources:
1. Conventional Wisdom. Traditional conventional wisdom tells
us that it's time to rest and play, take it easy, and ride off into
the sunset. It insists that if we just have enough money, retirement
will take care of itself. It whispers that this is the beginning of
the end. Well, personally, I'm not ready to cash it in just yet,
thank you very much. And, I'll bet, you aren't either. So ignore the
old Conventional Wisdom, and model a whole new way of thinking.
2. Financial Advisors. Let me be perfectly upfront. I have
nothing against financial advisors. My experience, though, is that
many of them are listening to the old Conventional Wisdom on money.
They don't realize that those tired old formulas (you know, the ones
that tell you that you'll need 80% of your current income to
maintain your current lifestyle) are, well, tired and old and no
longer fit many of us. They don’t see that we're earning longer,
creating exciting new careers (and revenue streams), and most
importantly, figuring out how we want to live and THEN figuring out
how much money we'll need.
3. Listening to Friends. Friends mean well, but they often
project their fears and limiting beliefs onto us and can bring us
crashing down if we let them. Take my client, Jane, who at 61 was
"downsized" by her company, but in no way was she ready to retire.
So, she took the bold step of following her dream of becoming a life
coach. Since confidence builds more confidence, it wasn't long
before she decided to take an even bigger leap and moved to
Asheville, North Carolina -- another lifelong dream. Interesting
that just as Jane was beginning to soar, some of her friends tried
to shoot her down. Her friends where she was living didn’t want to
lose her, and her friends where she grew up wanted her to come
"home". Jane knew instinctively that staying would have kept her
stuck, and going home, for her, would have been moving backwards.
Jane listened to her heart, and now she's living her dreams. The
best part? She’s combined her coaching and everything she learned
from her big move into a fabulous new business called
Relocating Single.
4. Advice from Families. Families also mean well, but don't
really know what’s best for us. Take Rachel, a widow, who is newly
retired and selling her house. Her grown kids were pushing hard for
her to move into a retirement community, but at 65 it just didn't
feel right to Rachel. Instead, she followed her heart and embarked
on her lifelong dream of traveling in India and told the kids she'd
"think about" the retirement community when she returned. But, high
in the hills above Rishikesh, Rachel stumbled into a beautiful oasis
called Ramana's Garden, home to 60 orphans. She fell in love with
Ramana's Garden. She fell in love with the kids. She signed on for a
two-year volunteer stint. Three months later, enter Jan, a retired
IBM executive from the Netherlands. He fell in love with Ramana's
Garden. He fell in love with the kids. He fell in love with Rachel,
and signed on for two years. Six months later they were married.
Sigh.
5. Spouse/Significant Other. Here's what I see over and over
again at my Boot Camps with many of the women who come with their
partners. Instead of playing 100% for themselves, they spend the
weekend focused on and worrying about their other half, waiting for
them to figure out what they want and then sort of following along.
When I work with couples, I insist on working first with each
partner individually to discover what they really want, then bring
them together to see where the touch points are and help them
negotiate the rest.
The best way to revolutionize retirement is to commit to doing this
transition differently than any that have come before. Start by
tuning in to your heart, and tuning out the rest.
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN
YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you keep it
intact and include this blurb with it: Certified Retirement
Coach Lin Schreiber, author of The ABC's of Revolutionizing
Retirement, helps self-reliant women reinvent themselves in the
next stage of life, formerly known as "retirement." To claim your
free Revolutionize Retirement Starter Kit, visit her site at
http://www.RevolutionizeRetirement.com.
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Hello
{!firstname}:
Lin
Schreiber is a Retirement Revolutionary who loves helping
self-reliant women reinvent themselves in the next stage of life,
formerly known as "retirement." Like Lin, her clients have a
positive vision for the future, and the idea of riding off into the
sunset for the next 30-40 years isn't in the picture.
